The Change That Makes A Difference

Where in the world has Spring gone. It's already mid July for crying out loud. It's summer and things have slowed down here in the South. The humidity hangs in the air as sun beats it's familiar feeling on your skin. It rains daily, keeping the trees and grass a pleasant shade of green. The insect life here is impressive to say the least. Thank God mosquitos don't like me. The bull frogs sound like ducks quacking in the backyard at night and one beat his way to front door, as if wanting to come. He kept jumping into it, sounded like someone was knocking.

The oil spill lingers on people's minds and hearts, much like a cancer cell that grows larger. I heard BP is hiring adjusters. Many are applying.

Me, I've slowed down and have had time to make the necessary changes that were required. I've taken time to dream a new life. The old one just didn't suit me. I don't even know who that person is anymore.

I suppose many of my friends have not been able to understand my meanderings for the last several months. Once I left New Jersey and Manhattan I guess I was kinda off the page of what they expected me to do. Heck I was off the page in what I expected me to do.

A new chapter in my life was in order and I was tired of having the same conversations with the same people. I felt like I was living the movie Groundhog's Day. It was really dragging me down. Sometimes when we make a change, its the people in our lives that aren't allowing us to do so. They don't see the new you. All they see is the old you. I've stayed in touch via email with most of my good friends, just know I still love you all.

Many changes have been made and sometimes we won't really know what we want until there is nothing in our lives to mirror back to us our old life. You can't remake yourself doing the same things, saying the same things and hanging around with the same folks. Once you change then you can touch base to see who will allow the new you or who will suck you back into that old energy of who you used to be. Just my opinion.

Also I had to change the thoughts that kept running through my head. I had to get rid of "no one will ever love me, all the great guys are taken, I am always going to be broke, I will never write anything of value, I hate my life etc., etc. etc." I didn't really think any of that was true, but some part of me did. Enough of me, which kept me stuck in repeat mode.

I started to love me. Instead of the old limiting thoughts, I filled my head with positive affirmations. I began to see a different world, a world filled with love and laughter, not lack. I concentrated on my life and what I wanted in it, instead of what I didn't want. Basically you have to walk the walk and talk the talk. And now I finally feel that I can heal and move onto a life filled with love, beauty, abundance and laughter.

During the past several months, I've also had to deal with health problems without insurance. However, the Louisiana State University Medical System helps those working individuals without insurance. In fact, Louisiana didn't want the federal healthcare reform program, because this state already takes care of their own citizens. I have to say I have run into some Earth Angels that have helped me, bringing me to tears with all the hugs and love they have given me. I just had to allow them to help me.

Along with having to have my right hip replaced due to hip dysplasia, I found out I am allergic to either gluten or peanuts. Before I went to the doctor, I thought I had everything under the sun. The next step is an allergist to determine the cause of the allergic reaction. But hey I am still alive and kicking. Now, I am just waiting for a surgery date in New Orleans to get my right hip replaced. I will announce that when it happens.

Next up, I plan on moving to Austin in the fall, but one step at a time. First the surgery, then healing and then the move to the city's whose motto suits me fine "Keep Austin Weird." I guess I will fit right in.

Perhaps the best development is that I have started my book and a publisher is interested. I met one of the editors while working at the Census. Getting three chapters to him, has proved a daunting task, but I am doing it. So things are rolling along.

Although things haven't gone smoothly on the road to self-discovery, as bad as they got, I made myself feel better by saying "At least I am not on the commuter bus going into Manhattan." That always seems to put things in perspective for me.

Hurrah...life can begin anew. The Solar Eclipse tomorrow, although not visible in North America, is helping with these new energies everyone is feeling. Well that is if you are tuned into that sort of thing, which I totally am.

I want to thank all of my dear friends who have supported me in following my heart. You know who you are. Maybe you just thought of me happy, maybe you just sent me an email that made me laugh, perhaps you've said a prayer or two. I appreciate everything!

May God bless you all. Namaste.

Celebrating Freedom? A Dose of Reality

How free can Americans truly be this Independence day? "Home of the brave, land of the free," should be changed to "home to the broke, and land of the enslaved." This country's debt is a staggering $13 trillion and counting. Check out the debt counter. http://www.usdebtclock.org/

A large part of this debt can be contributed to the Iraq War that most Americans do not support and were taken into by deceptive measures. Wake up America, our government knew about 911 long before it happened. If they didn't help to plan it, they allowed it. Buildings don't come down like that unless there are strategically placed detonations devices. Metal doesn't melt by jet fuel alone. It was never about terrorism. It was about instilling fear into Americans, so that corporations could rob the world of oil. But moving on.

We are in the worst economic times since the Great Depression and it ain't over yet. Check out this video. I watched the entire presentation on Link TV by Richard D. Wolff, Professor of Economics Emeritus, University of Massachusetts, Amherst.

In May, one in every 400 households in this country had received a foreclosure filing, according to RealtyTrac 's U.S. Foreclosure Market Report. The US unemployment rate for the last two years has hovered around 10 percent, only rivaled by the period in the mid 1980s. Check it out: http://www.miseryindex.us/urbymonth.asp

Congress sold out to corporate America long ago, passing laws allowing them to do as they please. Corporate America has experienced record productivity and profit levels over the last 40 years, according to Wolff. Due in part by its massive outsourcing practices, putting millions of Americans out of work. Getting even more greedy, some Wall Street genius created an investment vehicle called CMBS (Commercial Mortgage Backed Securities), which is now bringing down lenders worldwide -- harkening back the days of the early 1990's and the Savings and Loan crisis. However, we have already surpassed the number of banks that have failed in the S&L catastrophe and as of March 31 the FDIC is in a deficit of $20.7 billion. Bank failures are expected to peak this year (83 have failed already in 2010) and be slightly higher than the 140 that fell in 2009. Check it out: http://www.usatoday.com/money/industries/banking/2010-06-19-bank-failure-pace-tops-2009_N.htm

According to Wolff, the reason we are in such dire straights is because even though corporate profits are up, corporations haven't increased the standard of living for Americans since the 1970s when you compare inflation rates with salaries. However, as Wolff states, Americans work longer hours than any other country in the world. So we are working harder and longer for less money. And you'll love this, because our standard of living hasn't increased, the credit card companies loan us the money to buy all the material things they say we need. And because we no longer make the money to save to buy a house, companies loan us money, which they then trade on to make additional money. And low and behold when Americans were at their debt limit and could no longer pay-- wala the subprime mortgage meltdown. Corporate America lulled Americans into complacency and we bought it hook, line and sinker.

In case you didn't get the concept yet let me explain. When the 70's ended Amercian's standard of living froze and has not increased since, and yet corporate profits have soared. And with this profit investment banks invested in what they thought was a safe bet the CMBS market, allowing them to trade on and profit from commercial real estate loans in addition to residential loans. When the bubble burst and they got caught with their pants down who bailed them out? We did the ones they turned their backs on when the profits rolled in.

Meanwhile, millions of Americans are without access to quality health care, because of pre-existing conditions or job loss. Yet our US Congressmen and women have access to the best health insurance in the country without having to deal with pre-existing conditions. Why shouldn't they? After all they are the ones who let the insurance companies get away with murder. It's their just rewards for looking the other way, while millions suffer. The temporary high-risk insurance pool created by the Health Care Reform Act that was to be in place by July 1 is now put off until the fall of this year. Who are we kidding? The insurance companies have until 2014 to raise rates across the board for undoubtedly less coverage. You can't force a conscience on an industry.

To top it all off we allowed the oil companies to screw us again by creating what is likely to be the largest oil spill in American History in the Gulf of Mexico, killing not only livelihoods of millions of Americans who depend on the waters of the Gulf, but millions of sea creatures who call it home. The oil is still flowing, skimmer ships that should have been in place weeks ago have finally been deployed. Why? It's as if BP and Halliburton want this to go on as long as it can. We have the technology to create a clean, reliable energy source and yet the government refuses to acknowledge this. Why, because corporate American would stand to lose billions of dollars. We have polluted our lands, our waters for the sake of profit.

We are fast becoming a third world country. There is approximately 30 to 40 million people living in poverty in the US, according to the National Poverty Center. The population of California is 36 million. Capitalism doesn't work, because the people that run these companies have no soul. They truly only care about profits.

Independence, that's a joke. We are not free when corporate America runs this country. We have to be the change we see in this world. Instead of setting off fireworks this weekend, we should all pray for and send light to the Gulf of Mexico that is slowly dying and all those Americans without homes, without jobs and without health care insurance.